VEEP 304: CLOVIS – BEST ZINGERS (and other great lines)


Selina was in Silicon Valley this week, I suppose to raise money (although I am not exactly positive about that).  She spent most of the episode fumbling around Clovis, a Google-like internet company headed by a young d-bag (shocking).  The only thing that would have made this episode better would have been some sort of crossover event with the guys that actually star on HBO’s new comedy Silicon Valley, which airs right before Veep each week.  Oh well.  Let’s get to the best part of the show…the one-liners.

Again, you have been warned, there is colorful language below.

8.  “Jonah get off then line and then the planet.” – Sue

7.  “Gary what are you doing? You look like a newborn giraffe.” – Veep

6.  “F*ck you Kent Davidson!  F*ck you Mrs. Gravestone from the third grade.  F*ck you stepdad one and stepdad three!” – Jonah

5.  “She was like a beached whale, with one flipper f*cking around in the air, and you were no where to push her back in the sea.” – Amy

4.  “She said we’d see Craig momentarily and our withdrawal from Afghanistan has been more momentarily than this.” – Amy

3.  “You know, they say all babies are cute, but whoever ‘they’ are should be stuck in a stroller and pushed into traffic.” – Amy

2.  “I know you’re walking around here like you’re C-3PO with a big, brass, shiny erection, but I got news for you.  This is kindergarten for cyberbrats.” – Veep

1.  “You take that chicken soup, and you shove it up your soul.” – Jonah


PS.  Here is deleted scene from this episode.  You’re welcome.



So, last week was the episode after the episode that included the big purple wedding, which basically means that it had a lot to live up to.  And, for the most part, I think it did.  But, because there was no major event this week, it also meant that we returned to sorta tour-guide mode, i.e., we spent most of the episode checking in with different people at different places.  This, for the most part, is the typical Game of Thrones model for each episode, but it usually means that we only get to see little snip-bits of everyone.  Personally, I am just glad to see Dany again.*  Let’s get to talking.

*I know we don’t talk about movies on this blog, but CJ and I recently saw Emilia Clarke in Dom Hemingway (starring Jude Law).  Awesome movie and Emilia was amazing, plus she sings, so I pretty much died.

1.  Off course it was Littlefinger – So first things first, we get confirmation that Dontos was involved the poisoning plot and that it was partially designed to get Sansa out of King’s Landing.  However, it is also revealed that the mastermind behind the poisoning plot was Littlefinger.  Gosh, I hate Littlefinger.  He is so smarmy.  And, now, Sansa has been delivered into his arms.  Don’t forget that Littlefinger always had a thing for Sansa’s mother, which kind of adds a whole new creepiness into this scenario.  I am glad that Sansa is out of King’s Landing (and hopefully out of the clutches of the Lannisters), but is she really any better off with Littlefinger?  At least at the moment, I suppose, she isn’t being tried for killing the King, so there is the upside.**

**I am still not clear if the Tyrells were involved in the Littlefinger plan or not.  But, last episode seemed to imply that Margaery may end up getting to marry Joffrey’s younger brother now…whose name I should probably start learning at this point.

2.  That thing that happened – Most of the talk surrounding this past episode seemed to be about the scene between Jaime and Cersei and whether or not it was consensual or not.  I don’t really want to get into that aspect of the scene.  Because whether it was or it wasn’t, I am most upset about it because Jaime still wants to be “doing it” with his sister.  And, that is still super gross.  I loved the Jaime of last season, i.e., the Jaime outside of King’s Landing–the one who jumped into a bear pit with one arm to save Brienne.  I don’t want Jaime to revert back to his old ways simply because he is back in King’s Landing.  I want the new and improved Jaime.

3.  Tywin is in the empire business – I think it is abundantly clear that the worst person in King’s Landing and maybe all of Westeros is Tywin.  He has the most influence and power, now that Joffrey is dead, he is pretty much the de facto King…given how malleable young Tommen appears to be.  It’s just moments after Joffrey’s death and we see Tywin laying the foundation for his manipulation of the future new King, Tommen.  We also see him firming up his alliances; for instance, by recruiting Oberyn Martell to fill the open spot on the Small Council.  I just hope Oberyn has still kept his hatred of the Lannisters with him, even if he does appear to come the side of the Lannisters.

4.  Stannis – Remember when Stannis made such a big deal about the threat from the North?  Well we are now three episodes into season 4 and he hasn’t mentioned it yet.  This bugs the hell out of me. I mean I get that he is still interested in being the “King,” but I am a little disappointed that he hasn’t expressed any concerns about what is happening in the North, beyond what we saw in the season 3 finale.  Get it together buddy.

5.  I really need a prison break – How long are we going to have to watch Tyrion be in prison for?  Actually, I suppose, I should be happy that he is in prison and not dead yet.  I just really don’t want to see Tyrion stuck in prison for the rest of the season.  At least, we still get to see him giving some amazing speeches, even if he is just stuck in a room for the entire episode.***

***And, what does Tyrion’s accusal mean for Bronn?  It seems like we won’t have any more Jaime/Bronn sword lessons anytime soon, right?

6.  Mother of Dragons does it again – Not only do we get to witness Daario #2 easily and masterfully take out the champion of Meereen, but we also get to see Dany being Dany, which is always a thing of greatness.  To be honest, I was little worried that Dany was attacking the city with all of the innocent slaves watching (that didn’t seem like the right thing to do). But, when the barrels broke and revealed broken chains and collars, I was in awe of Dany’s intelligence and strategy.  Whether Dany ever makes it to Westeros or not, I don’t think it matters to me.  I could watch Dany being Dany for hours.


Obviously, much more happened in last week’s episode (I didn’t even touch on the Jon Snow or Sam bits or the new adventures of Arya and the Hound), but seeing as this post is happening so late, we might as well just wait a few more hours and see what is in store for them this week.  Happy Game of Thrones Day everyone!




I know many people out there who have given up on Mad Men. The show is too sad, or too dark, or it’s just Don Draper repeating his same mistakes over and over again. Whatever the reason may be, a lot of people just kind of can’t take any more. And, I suppose, on some level, I understand that, but I’ll never agree with it. There were lots of people who think season 6 showed that Mad Men had “lost its fastball,” so to speak. But, I think if those people went back and looked at season 6 again, they would see that it was not the case. When I looked back on my favorite moments to do research for a post we put up a couple weeks ago (about Mad Men moments), I found myself gravitating to several key moments from last year. The show is just as rich as ever, and I’ll argue, it’s only getting better.

To that end, I am of the opinion that an episode such as episode 702, A Day’s Work, only proves that Matt Weiner and crew remain at the top of their game, and, that when they are, the product is truly the most outstanding thing on television. Again, I understand that Mad Men has lost its luster for many people, but I don’t think that is on the show, I think that’s on us as viewers. We no longer have the patience for a show such as Mad Men. What, no zombies head’s getting lopped off? No vampire on human sex scenes? No garage door opener/machine gun massacres? or DRAGONS?! Mad Men always has been, and always will be a show about people. Just people. No super powers. No vigilante justice. No whatever it is Olivia Pope does (only LJ watches that show). Just a group of people trying to get through the next day. And, unfortunately, many of us no longer have the patience for this kind of show.

When I see an episode like A Day’s Work, I find it to be a real shame that we have lost our patience for television this outstanding. I’ll readily admit that I’m a sucker for an episode like this one, because I’m such a sucker for the Don/Sally relationship. If someone were to ask me to pick a single relationship on this show as my favorite, it would be Don and Sally. And, this past week’s episode gave us multiple scenes of outstanding work between these two, culminating in probably the greatest scene shared between the two over a cold burger and a tuna melt in a roadside diner, and a life changing declaration by Sally to close the episode.

The diner scene starts out as painful and awkward as many scenes between Don and Sally lately, but Don breaks the tension by continuing his trend of late: being honest with Sally. She learns earlier in the episode that Don is not working, and instead of trying to live one more lie, he gives Sally the truth about what is going on. One of the most fascinating things about the conversation is the way Don talks to Sally. He is clearly talking to her as if she is an adult at that table. He doesn’t talk down to her, he doesn’t say that she’s too young to understand. And even when he does try to side step the truth regarding moving out to California, Sally immediately calls him out on it. This conversation is a real break through for these two, and the ramifications are seen immediately.

When Don drops Sally at school, she says something that no one, especially Don, expected. Simple words, but so full of meaning to Don: “Happy Valentine’s Day. I love you.” The million emotions running through Don’s head at that point are beautifully apparent on the face and in the eyes of Jon Hamm (seriously — no Emmys for his work on this show, it’s insane). My thoughts went immediately to the fact that, to my best recollection, Sally has never spoken these words to her father (at least not on screen). I can imagine Don saw that car ride ending in several ways. Having his daughter tell him she loves him, was not one of them.

What this does for the show going forward, only time will tell. But I have no doubt that it will have major implications for Don. The fact is that this is hands down the finest written show on television with some of the best performances ever put to screen. And in all this, we haven’t even commented on the California woes of Pete and his small office; the best spin off idea ever of Shirley and Dawn; the Joffrey like villain forming in Lou Avery; the battle for power between Jim Cutler and Roger Sterling; Joan taking charge; and most importantly, masturbating gloomily with Peggy Olson.

I’ve always thought Mad Men was among the best things in the history of TV, and so far, this “final” season has only confirmed that. I wish more people would watch Mad Men…But honestly, at this point, there is nothing that could make this show feel any less special to me. Two episodes in to the beginning of the end, and I’m on the edge of my seat to see where the rest of 1969 takes these characters we’ve spent so much time with over the last 6+ seasons.



VEEP 303: ALICIA – BEST ZINGERS (and other great lines)


I could not be more excited about another season of Veep, especially if we continue to get such great writing as we have in season 3.  Last week, Veep tackled the tough issue of abortion.  This week, we get the issue of universal child care.  We also get some amazing lines.  Selina was on fire.

Insert same general warning about strong language below.

6.  “This rewrite kicks balls and ass.” – Veep

5.  “She sounds uncomfortable, like she is with a member of the public.” – Sue

4.  “What in the wide world of f*ck do you think you’re wearing?” – Veep

3.  “I want to tell real stories about real people. Ok.  I’m like Jon Steinbeck in that regard. Ya know, or like Denzel Washington.” – Jonah

2.  “What’s wrong, you look like you killed a hooker.” – Alicia

1.  “What were you bobbleheads doing while I was just getting ear-fucked by Father Time.” – Veep


PS.  Here is the deleted scene from this episode.  “Jonad, Jonad, Jonad.”  That should be enough to make you want to watch.




Today HBO announced that both Veep and Silicon Valley will be getting more seasons.  Veep will be back with its fourth season next year, whereas the new comedy Silicon Valley has been picked for a second season.

Veep was created by Armando Iannucci and stars Julia Louis-Dreyfus as vice president Selina Meyer, with a heart of gold (well that might be debatable) and a mouth like a sailor.  Veep’s third season premiered on April 6.  Dreyfus and Tony Hale both took home Emmys for their performances last year.  Personally, I think season 3 is the best season of Veep yet.

Mike Judge, from Office Space and Beavis & Butt-head, is responsible for Silicon Valley.  Silicon Valley also premiered on April 6 and stars Thomas Middleditch, T.J. Miller, Zach Woods, Kumail Nanjiani, Martin Starr, Josh Brener, Amanda Crew, and the late Christopher Evan Welch.  If you haven’t watched Silicon Valley, you should definitely check it out.  It’s pretty funny, even if you don’t know what a compression algorithm is (trust me, I still have no freakin clue).





Happy Friday to you!  If you are bummed to be working this Friday (when a lot of people have a holiday) or are simply looking for a pick me up this morning, then I have the video for you.  Joanna Robinson and David Chen from the Cast of Kings podcast have created a music video using the very popular “Let it Go” song from Frozen with Game of Thrones themed lyrics.  It’s performed by Gail Folsom.  If you love Frozen as much as you love Game of Thrones than this will be epic for you.  If you haven’t seen Frozen or Game of Thrones, then you need to reevaluate your life choices.



The first season 2 trailer for Orange is the New Black was released today.  And, it is a-maz-ing.  Piper sure isn’t the same woman she was when she first entered prison.  But, Crazy Eyes still appears to be crazy.  Plus, we have a new inmate this season, “Vee,” played by Lorraine Toussaint as well as another new inmate who says what everyone is thinking:  “This is not how I imagined prison to be at all.”  Notably though, there is no Pennsatucky that we can see, does that mean she met her end last season?

Orange is the New Black returns June 6 to Netflix.  If it is half as good as this trailer, you won’t want to miss it!

-LJ & CJ

PS.  In case you missed some season 2 photos that Netflix released, here you go.  Apparently, there will be blood.